A Little Q & A

A friend, whom I greatly respect, recently posed the following questions to me.

What do you believe the first impression strangers have of you? 

Since I have had many, many encounters, I suspect the first impression is either a positive or at least a curious one. Given my disposition, I believe I am seen as a positive person, someone worth speaking with. In these days of COVID, while working at the art museum as a greeter, many people have the option of simply avoiding me or engaging me. Most engage me or at least greet me favorably.

I understand that every single person who sees me for the very first time is making some type of assessment. But that is true of almost everyone we meet. I can truly say that I have never had a negative experience to my face. I certainly know I have rolled a few eyeballs, I know I have been discussed between couples that have met me, but I firmly believe I have left nothing but generally positive impressions.

I can say that I have not shied away from putting myself out there. I have said here and in other places that tens of thousands of people have seen me. I will use one specific example. The Cleveland Museum of Art (pre-COVID) held a Summer Solstice party. We generally have over five thousand visitors. In 2018, I was the main greeter, directing people to the appropriate line. Just that night alone, I got 5,000 look-sees with many, many positive comments. I was a prominent participant in the monthly museum MIX parties, which regularly hosted (I miss those days…) a few thousand guests.

What do you suppose people think of you after meeting?

I am certain I have been a topic of conversation in many a person’s home!

It would be foolish of me to think I wasn’t discussed. If my wife and I met a “sister” in the wild (obviously I have an interest), we would discuss or at least mention her.

Many, many people that I have met and have been unable to remember (I meet so many, especially when we had the monthly parties at the art museum, I have difficulties remembering everyone), have come up to me and reintroduced themselves. That happened just the other day. That tells me the initial reaction was a positive one. Because I respect the privacy of others, I don’t post too many pictures of me with other people, but I have many, many photos demonstrating how I have been perceived.

PLEASE don’t mistake this for arrogance on my part. Frankly, me, no one would give a damn. Kandi, different story.

How do you explain being a bigender M2F crossdresser to a stranger? 

I guess I would have to understand it myself to explain it. But one thing I always do is encourage questions. I have told many a person to ask whatever they want, telling them I cannot be offended. And I have been asked many different types of questions. One group of woman even asked me, let me phrase this delicately, if I was shaved “down there”. [This happened at a North Coast Men’s Chorus concert, so there, this type of question was not unexpected.] I’ll leave the answer to your imagination…..

My very simple explanation of why I am dressed as I am is that it makes me happy. If we don’t encourage others to try and understand us, how will we change anything?

My mission in my life now is to make a difference. Help a sister. Be a positive example. I have had a lot of great things in my life and I have a lot of struggles. What’s the point of it all if you can’t turn it all around and make a difference?

Thank you, my friend, for sparking me to think a bit.

We’ve added 2017 to the Gallery page, quite a remarkable year! Check it out!!

from Kandi's Land https://kandis328772669.wordpress.com/2020/11/06/a-little-q-a/
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